How The Earth Got Her Groove Back


God 1 Do you think it’s working?

God 2 YES!…. Did you see the rage meter today? Anger is an all time high. I caught 2 new lightning bolts and was able to harness enough fuel for a new iceberg.

God 1 Yeah… But do you think you’re getting the best from all those people when you keep throwing all that trauma at them?

God 2 Why ask such silly questions? Did you see that phoenix rising tattoo that woman placed on her body after her husband betrayed her? A total work of art. We got access to her heart medicine, she paid an artist—that’s good for the economy– (Slaps his hands together) all in a days work.

God 1 You destroyed her. And her family. And her trust. All for a little dose of healing energy? Did you check that against the sustained energy of the power and strength of long term love?

God 2 Everyone knows that healing energy generated from a good trauma is the strongest energy in the planet. And frankly, it’s just what we need.

God 1 Did you not read the latest energy on human sustainable energy harnessing practices? They just totally debunked that myth and reported that consistent joy is the most sustainable and reliable energy source.

God 2 Hard to believe. (pulls out map and examines it) I’ll just drop a bomb on this little country and insert some war. I haven’t gotten a spike from them in years. You’ll see. There will be an explosion of love that will feed the gods 5 good 7 course dinners.

God 1 (Looking over his shoulder) you won’t get anything from them.

God 2 What are you talking about? All I have to do is drop a bomb— and BOOM! Love comes to town. Now that we implanted that network where all people can have access to all feelings all of the time, I’ll be getting pain, redemption and love from all around the globe.

God 1 Won’t work. Everyone knows that’s where the lost and dead go…TV Land. Most of them are so numb from all of the violence they are exposed to that a bomb dropping on them wouldn’t even register as different than every day life.

God 2 Oh. THOSE people. Yeah, total waste of my time.

God 1 It’s not working: all this traumatizing the planet. You’ve let yourself turn into a thief: all this breaking people, and then stealing the energy that is released in the process.. There’s no integrity in it… for heaven’s sake: you’re a god. Can’t you think up something more at your skill level?

God 2 Why do you think I started meditation? Kundalini? Yoga? FOCUS BABY. (pounds on his chest) Mine Mine MINE. I really get off on all that focused energy. Those are some straight feeders.

God 1 I’m telling you something, and I’m only going to say it one more time….

I examined the energetic analysis: and we’re off 15 seasons, a flood, 6 rainbows, and 16 perfect blue skies with puffy white clouds— as of 3,7897 trijikilons ago. Usually, by now we would have enough energy stored to carry us through a nice long winter, but the energy is so scattered and frenetic by all those broken hearts, that I can barely gather a few rain drops.

God 2 Your point.

God 1 Your strategy sucks.

God 2 Tell me how you really feel.

God 1 I studied the history books, and did a cross karmic analysis, and while you are right— the trauma drama does give off a huge jolt of energy, it comes in a lightning strike, and it’s just luck of the draw if we catch it in time to use it. I’m pretty sure someone needs to speak with Zeus about getting glasses. He missed the past 6 bolts that came his way.

God 2 He’s always had lousy eye site. Your point.

God 1 Don’t get stormy with me. My point is that when they were all singing and dancing together, creating that unified field & resonance they like so much, it was a consistent form of energy– it was just a wheel that kept on turning — the seasons moved with complete ease— which made it effortless to feed them, and in return they just kept giving and giving and giving to us. It was a good time when they were feeding us consistent joyful energy: which turns out to be a far more reliable energy source.
And then someone got greedy, and thought they could get more energy for less work.

The time has come for us to stop traumatizing them.

God 2 No reason to get your god sparks in a wad…

God 1 Don’t you get it? You stopped the flow of giving and receiving when you traumatized everybody.

All those wars you created to get your big hit of love– forced people out of their homes, cut them from the roots of their culture and land, filled them with trauma, removed their capacity to take fully care of their own, which has led to three of the most narcissistic generation on earth– who are all keeping their energy for themselves, making you more desperate than ever!

Now all that is left is the selfie generation desperate to be seen because they were raised in a culture that was so outward focused they didn’t learn how to stoke their own inner fires or those around them. YOU BROKE THE CARDINAL LAW THAT RULES EARTH: the rules of giving and receiving. Don’t you get it?

All because of you wanted to get a quick hit

God 1 But I’m a destroyer God. What will I do if I’m not breaking hearts, crushing feet, and blowing up homes? It’s what I’m best at. You know that. What will they do? Let’s face it: they have come to depend on me.

God 2 You’re right. Your capacity to ruin what is working is a natural gift.

God 1 Getting people to betray themselves is just such an easy. All the rage and BOOYA! I got my daily quota and I’m out! I can be done with work by 10am and I got my energy requirement in for the day.

God 2 I’m going to give it to straight: you’ve become lazy and haven’t created a sustainable energy source for eons. Frankly, the council is concerned about your wasteful antics.

God 1 Well why didn’t you just come out and say that?

God 2 You weren’t listening. But now you are so I’ll tell you this: All the trauma you’ve created on Earth is on the verge of creating a psychic storm in the cosmos. The council won’t be having this. We’ll give you 2 weeks to figure this out and put the seasons back in order or we’re animating Earth.

God 1 Two weeks? I can’t turn this mess around in 2 weeks!!

God 2 God made Earth in 7 days. You can clean up this mess in twice that time? Just remember: haste is just making waste. Slow them down, regulate their nervous systems, get them singing and dancing, cut the escapism meditation antics (you know that’s just fast food energy and filled with empty calories). And get rid of all the trauma drama.

God 1 Awe man, you mean I need to get Shonda Rhimes to think up a new series?

God 2 Singing and dancing STAT. We need a regular sustainable source of energy that we can count on. And for heaven’s sake, stop picking on LA and send them some rain. That will get them dancing in the streets.


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Leah Lamb

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